bathroom

Today, my baby is the size of a poppy seed.
We paid the water bill, why hasn't the water been turned on yet? I must get to wait the maximum time of 5:30 because I spat rudeness right back to the lady after she spat it to me.

I would love a hot bath.
I miss my husband.
My son is adorable.
The battle of baby names has started. We have a girls name picked out, but I'm going to say we are guaranteed a boy. I just have a feeling, and the chinese lunar calendar says so.. however, we still aren't even close to a boys name. Andrew will only give me one name that he wants and is so stubborn about: Jude Paul Jansen. Uh no. I liked it at first, but now it reminds me of 'Dude.' The only other names he has given me are Maximus and Manchester..oh and Carlos...sigh.



I would love to be able to use the bathroom. Hurry up water company. I paid you a rediculous amount of money 6 hours ago.

I love how our water can be shut off, rent could be late, tons of stressful and bad things can be happening, but my baby just walks around with his toys and plays and has not a clue what is going on. He is so carefree. I love him so much. I think I'll just try and spend the day playing with him, and maybe 5 will come a lot sooner...I hope.

I have felt overheated all day. I finally went to turn on the air when the thermostat said 82, and it's making a loud screeching sound and sounds like it might blow up. Scary. Andrew is out looking at it, but I don't think we will get far. Time to break out the kiddy pool.

BTW. I hate when people said 'Woot Woot'

Time for sleep

Feeling rather insomniac-ish.

It's 5am. I'm surprised I was able to stay in bed that long. I just keep tossing and turning. It has to be hormones. I'm having a hard time with Hayden right now. His night time sleeping pattern is really frustrating. If he isn't have a night terror, which is almost every night, then he will just scream and arch his back and reach out and hit or pull whichever is closest, which this morning was a chunk of my hair. It's the most obnoxious and foul sounding growl/scream. I feel bad for him. He needs to sleep. Since we started the chamomile before bed, he has been sleeping from the time we put him down, to about 4/5 am, wakes up freaking out, and then usually goes back down within the hour until about 8. That's better than before, but I could definitely do without the sudden outburst that sends me into full panic mode.

I can't stop thinking about telling Andrew's parents. His mom and I have been getting along so well because we have been honest with them and I've opened up a little more. They are going to be so disappointed that we are pregnant again. There is no way I can tell her that we were trying. First of all, she thinks that nobody should have children this close in age. 5 years apart is ideal apparently. Which I don't think is true. Second, she thinks just because we are in debt with student loans and credit cards and still getting back on our feet from Andrew not having a job, that we should have a baby any time soon. I understand that is isn't their choice and they need to just accept whatever we want, but the more we have accepted their help, the more we look like we can't handle life I guess and shouldn't be continuing our family. I wish we would have never had to ask for their help but things got really bad while Andrew was out of work.


I can hear Hayden screaming in the room. If Andrew doesn't get him, I hope he just settles down.


I feel a little blah. I guess its nice to have another symptom besides cramping all day. Makes me feel more optimistic.

First time!

Is it possible to have a clogged milk duct after being dry of milk for almost 21 months? I have a pain in my breast on the left side, its a little swollen but no little knots or lumps. It's been going on since before I ovulated and I thought it was just from AF but since it continued to hurt and then the other one did as well, I thought I would take an early pregnancy test to check. I didn't think anything would show up since I am not due for AF until April 1st so technically I'm only 11 days past ovulation maybe 12. My OPK was positive on the 14th but I my 'My days' calculator predicted the 15th. My friend didn't get her BFP until she was 4 days late. So anyways...




It was faint at first but then you could really see a pink line. Then I was totally not believing it and thinking something has to be wrong with the Dollar Store tests, so I took another one like 5 hours later and it was the same thing. So tomorrow, I'm going to use my first morning urine to take another and then I'll go buy a refill of my prenatals and contemplate how I'm going to come up with a large sum of $450 for my first midwife appt. I want to meet with my midwife first.



In other news, Hayden seems to be feeling a bit better, there is an overwhelming smell of campfire seeping into our bedroom window that is making me mad, and I am trying not to be too excited because I'm gunshy. We definitely aren't telling Andrew's parents and everyone else until I'm 12 weeks.

Tomorrow WILL be better.

Apparently it wasn't a good night to make soap. The powers at be were against me. List of events in order:

1) Added coffee to lye and huge fountain explosion happened. Caustic lye shot all over my arm and all over our stove into the burners and on our floor.

2.) Started over.. and Hayden wakes up with a night terror. Andrew cleaned up, while I turned my oils on low and took Hay for a drive around the block to calm down.

3.) Came back, Hay is stuffed up so he doesn't want to sleep. Andrew took him in the room and put on Toy Story and is laying with him. I'm hoping it's just allergies and not the flu hitting hard all of a sudden.

4.) Added the coffee to the lye with success, started blending them together, it traced nicely, and then I noticed the oils and liquid started to seperate and heard a weird noise with my hand blender... It had melted with the heat and was warped a little.

5.) Soap then decides to start expanding and boiling over and spilling out of the crock pot. Now I have it turned off, and it's cooling. I added the grounds, and it looks nice... I just hope it sets nice.. it doesn't look promising. I just poured it into the mold (which is a large cardboard box) and was thinking to myself.. 'what's next??' and I guessed the wax paper would melt and it would seep through the box. I was correct. This is frustrating.

I'm very very tired, my baby is miserable and is crying in the room with Andrew because he can't breathe, and my soap is possibly ruined. And to top that off, I'm still recovering from the stomach flu that snuck up on me this morning at the Radiologist office..

Tomorrow will be better.

Food log -in process

Hayden's food log:

Saturday March 20th, 2010

Breakfast:

Blueberry Yogurt
Peanut Butter & Grape Jelly Sandwich
Sippy of half Mongo Mango juice/half water (mango puree,white grape juice concentrate, cane sugar, filtered water, Vitamin C)


Lunch:

Turkey & Provalone sandwich with tiny bit of mayo and a tiny squirt of mustard on white bread
Mandarin orange
Veggie Thins crackers (2 tiny ones)

Snack: Mini peperoni and cheese pizza

Dinner: Borscht (Tomatoes, beets, carrots, vegetable broth, cabbage, garlic salt,
Mandarin orange


Sunday March 21st 2010 (Rash is red and all over from face to top of thighs)
Breakfast:

Pomegranate Blueberry Yogurt
Mandarin Orange

Lunch:
Borscht
Apple Cherry juice 1/4 juice/water

Snack:
Mandarin orange

Dinner:
Lasagna
Garlic french bread
fruit snack

mandarin orange


Monday, March 22nd (Rash looks like it's going away. No red color, just bumps)

Breakfast:
5oz. milk
A few bites of honey nut cheerios
Key Lime Pie yogurt
Mandarin orange
Apple cherry juice watered down

Lunch:
Mini corn dogs
Apple cherry juice watered down

5oz. milk

Snack:
Mandarin orange
1/2 cinnamon poptart

Dinner:
Mac n cheese & ground beef
Water

yessssssss.

I always think of things I want to write on here about, but I'm too lazy or busy with other things to actually take the time to get on here as often as I think of things.

Summary:
Andrew got a job. He will be filming professional horse shows. (AHAHAHA) It's a good paying job though, and it's going to look good on his resume since it's in the field he is/was going to school for. I'm so relieved/happy/excited/scared/stress free now.

Ovulation tracking/TTC has officially started up again.

The car had a flat tire, it was fixed

Fun plans for this weekend

Hayden might have asthma. I'm hoping the xrays show nothing, and the chronic night time cough/gag/puke fest will end soon with the albuterol syryp. I also don't want to have to give him the albuterol syryp all the time.

...I'm listening to him stir/toss and turn right now over the monitor....

Tomorrow, I was supposed to go to a birth fair/cloth diaper show thing with a fun kids band and toddler yoga and raffles and fun stuff with my best friend, but she doesn't want to go anymore, so I'm dragging Andrew with me and we are going to the Brewery afterwards. I'll have rootbeer. Hay can have chocolate milk. Andrew can have beer.

Please pray nothing will go wrong with the car tomorrow and we will get their safety and back.


Goodnight.

What went wrong??!

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Okay, so I'm following the Aubrey DoodlePants knitting pattern for shorties for Hay and I got down to the crotch and used the kitcheners stitch to to that, and something went terribly wrong...


First picture, I have my 40 stitches on my stitch holder and you can see the crotch in the middle and then my circulars on the other side just waiting to be made into a leg.



Next, you can see where I am ready to start my first leg that my circulars are attached to and where I ended my crotch.



So I start knitting, and it's inside out. (Kind of hard to see because I only did a few, but at first I didn't notice and did about 3 rows all the way around before noticing) The little 'v's are on the inside...




and another view of the inside-out-ness... This is taken from the outside of the pants..



and not only that, if I do it this way (which it's obvious I'm doing something wrong) there would be a big gaping hole between the crotch and where I start knitting..




A couple suggested I was pearling and not knitting, but I know for sure I wasn't pearling. I have no idea what I did wrong. I know I did the crotch like the instructional video said so I'm not sure what's going on but I want to finish these shorts for my son.

Tridnight.

A hot bath sounds incredible right now. I hate to admit that at 22 years old, one of the main reasons I want to take a bath is because I want to use my new soap. Am I the only one that feels this way when they get a new body wash? Hah.

Today, after another night of Hayden's tridnight parties, and then early wake up, I decided to get up, and drag Andrew to the park with Hay and I. It was fun, and I love having a photographer with me at all times. We got some great pictures of Hay, but we haven't edited them yet. While we were there, I sat in some fire ants, and since I was wearing a dress, I got bit all over my butt. When I used my hand to brush them off while I danced around in pain, they stuck to my hand and bit me there. Pleasant.

Then, we went to Costco and used some of our tax money to get half the store. We came home with $400 in groceries. It's insane but we needed it badly. Luckily, we have enough to pay off the car as well so we won't have that expense anymore. Just insurance, which we can cut down a little.